The anatomy of Grief…Wish you were here Dad

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“The darker the night,
the brighter the stars,
The deeper the grief,
the closer is God!”
Fyodor Dostoevsky

Who dies when they die

Asked the little child

The touch and the hugs

Said the girl with tears in her eyes

Soul never dies

Said the monk to be

Death is not end of life

Said the philosopher to be

At Amarnath Shrine, Kashmir

And she asked her dying father

And here is what he said

There is life in death

There is death in life

Hold close this fragile thread

Because before you know

It will be gone

Scattering the beads

We once called love..

Way he looked at me on my wedding

But no one taught her

The secret of acceptance

When life flew and winds blew

She smelled the essence

Not the body,

Not the mind

A smell of whispering pine

Telling he is fine

At Home, Habakadal, Kashmir

I searched for him the far off mountains

And in the blizzard and broken dreams

Hang on still he said

Without battling an eye lid

Papa with me at Kolahoi Peak, Kashmir

Papa with me in Mountains

I have no friends

Nor the happiness I pretend

Nor the enthusiasm  I show

Or make sad hearts glow..

Mountain Goat</font

Amarnath with Mom and Dad

Many years still

I don’t know how to deal with grief

One thing I know

You are tethered to me

With string only I can see


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8 Comments

  1. Reply

    Hetal

    June 3, 2021

    Wow, so soulful. It made me cry. Words can only express so much but it is evident that you have poured your heart & soul in this tribute. Time cannot heal events such as these. More power to you.
    As Jamie Anderson says, “Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go”

    2
    • Reply

      Dr. Varuna Raina

      June 30, 2021

      Thanks a lot Hetal for reading. You have so aptly put grief..Love with no place to go…may be not in tnagible but intangible just like breath everywhere.

  2. Reply

    Ishai Z Darzi

    June 2, 2021

    The expression and the way verses of the poem flow is beautiful/magical

    Keep resonating

    aum

    2
    • Reply

      Dr. Varuna Raina

      June 30, 2021

      thank you brother .

  3. Reply

    Gautam Dhar

    June 2, 2021

    Strong poem, this one. Fav 4 lines:
    I searched for him the far off mountains
    And in the blizzard and broken dreams
    Hang on still he said
    Without battling an eye lid.

    Waiting for more 🙂

    4
    • Reply

      Dr. Varuna Raina

      June 30, 2021

      thank you

  4. Reply

    Dr. P.K Koul

    June 2, 2021

    Dr. Raina
    Thank you for sharing the poem, a fitting tribute to your Father. Maej Dayakar Sarney

    4
    • Reply

      Dr. Varuna Raina

      June 30, 2021

      Thank you for reading.

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